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Please someone tell me: in what universe is this guy…

…hotter than this guy?

Is the entire world suffering from a degenerative eye disease? Apparently, 2,000 Glamour Magazine readers are. At least, to his great credit, Robert Pattinson is aware of the absurdity of the situation.

In other news:

  • Did Jack Tweed (Jade Goody‘s widower) use a three-month late “spring cleaning” excuse to cover up for a party filled with “naked frolics and a game of strip poker”? “It was crazy,” one partygoer said. “There was nakedness in every room.”(The Sun)

  • Danielle Lloyd – the alleged beauty queen who was thrown through a glass table at a nightclub – has revealed her nasty scar.(The Sun)
  • The next season of X Factor will feature a contestant with Asperger’s syndrome.(The Sun)
  • Sharon Osbourne says being “short, fat, and hairy” meant she had to “develop a brain and personality and be fun and smart and learn to get on with people and make deals.”(The Sun)
  • Robbie Williams has announced his second or third attempt at a comeback album, due out in November in the UK.(Guardian)

    The Daily Telegraph‘s Neil McCormick gives Mika a FIVE STAR REVIEW for his big performance at Camden’s Roundhouse: “For all his relative youth (he is still only 25) he has the crowd-control instincts of a showbusiness veteran, switching instinctively between gushing humility and drama-queen teasing. But it is the sheer pleasure he communicates in performing, his exuberance, and flamboyance, that makes it all so infectious. It’s one thing to see his natural audience of women and gay men jumping up and down and singing along with abandon, but by the end even reluctant, arms-folded husbands and boyfriends seem to shed their ambitions and surrender to the force of his choruses.”

  • Radiohead have released a song in tribute to the last living British WWI hero, who passed away last month.(NME)
  • Jordan and her cage-fighter boyfriend have been spotted cavorting raunchily in front of innocent children!!!(Mirror)
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By Kevin Wicks
Kevin Wicks is the founding editor of Anglophenia.