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  • Simon Cowell tells The Mirror he will retire from X-Factor and American Idol in three years: “I have three more seasons under contract with American Idol and that will be it. And it will probably come at the same time in the UK. I am contracted for another two or three seasons in Britain and I think by that point the public will be sick to death of me anyway and it will be time to go.” Dude, that ship has sailed. I’m already sick to death of seeing his little trapezoid head and wiggly man-titties on my television everywhere I turn…so this can’t happen soon enough for me.

  • Ew ew ew: the “lovefest” between Cowell and fellow judge Dannii Minogue persists: Cowell says Danni is “sexier” than her sister, pop star Kylie. “I tell you something, given the choice between Kylie and Dannii, I would go for Dannii any day.” (Contact Music)
  • The Guardian‘s Gareth McLean isn’t anticipating tomorrow’s season premiere of X-Factor: “It’s not just that the feigned bickering between any permutation of Louis Walsh, Sharon Osbourne, and Simon Cowell is wearying. It’s not simply the formulaic nature of it all, from the auditions featuring wacky idiots/folks with mental health issues to the final eliminations during which the phrases ‘You’ve got a great career ahead of you’ and ‘You remind me of a young Aretha Franklin‘ are repeated ad infinitum. It’s that the whole thing reeks of cynicism.”
  • The photographer convicted of assaulting Heather Mills has been sentenced to 140 hours of community service.(Reuters)
  • Did the Beckhams buy their Beverly Hills mansion from con men? Their real estate agents are now facing fraud charges.(Mirror)
  • Victoria Beckham will release a “handbag-size style guide” for American women.(Page Six)
  • Prince Harry‘s girlfriend, Chelsy Davy, had an emergency appendectomy after collapsing yesterday.(The Sun)
  • Actor Michael Sheen talks to BBC about taking Frost/Nixon from the stage to the big screen.
  • Paddy Considine has directed his first film, Dog Together, and he tells The Guardian how the directors he’s worked with as an actor have influenced him.
  • The Inspector Lynley Mysteries are done, finito, kaput!(The Stage)
  • Actress Gina Bellman (Jekyll, Coupling) has joined the cast of Nearly Famous, Britain’s answer to Fame: “Made by Life on Mars producer Kudos Film and TV, Nearly Famous follows the lives of a group of students who have been awarded places at a top London school for performing arts and have just one chance to prove they have what it takes.”(The Stage)
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By Kevin Wicks
Kevin Wicks is the founding editor of Anglophenia.