“I’d rather ask for forgiveness than for permission.” If I had a dollar for every time I’ve heard an American say this, I wouldn’t need a pension plan. To be honest, it sometimes makes this rule-bound Brit nervous, brought up to follow rules even when they’re borderline nonsensical. For Brits wanting to break out a little, there’s good news—you’re home! Americans are completely cool with ignoring silly rules especially if the end justifies the means.
Keep off the grass
Probably because of the “parkies” (park keepers) many of us grew up with, who were only slightly less formidable than traffic wardens, we kept off those no-go zones as if our lives depended on it. Unless, of course, we were playing a game of dare.
In my area of the U.S., we have lots of public green space with (polite) notices to “Kindly stay off the grass” and “Please, no dogs.” Every day I see someone blatantly walking on forbidden ground or letting their dogs gambol around the “No dogs” signs. Why? Answers range from “Well, there’s nothing planted at the moment,” to my bête noir, “My dog loves kids. It’ll be fine.” In the U.K. it wouldn’t be unusual for a little old handbag-wielding granny to give them what for, but I rarely see challengers here.
Walk through many public grassy places in the U.S. and you’ll find unofficial routes where walkers have decided that the paved path wasn’t to their liking. One of my regular dog-walking routes has two such paths, but I still walk on the official, paved path. Not sure if I’m trying to set an example, or I’m worried about being caught, but hey—it’s in the blood.
And speaking of the formidable, many Brits are raised in fear of the dreaded traffic warden. I am the only person I know in the U.S. who’s never had a parking ticket; it’s not that I wouldn’t love to park illegally from time to time, but I know I’d find a little keepsake flapping under the wipers on my return. In the U.S., while there are traffic cops galore, most people I know will risk a spot of illegal parking if they’re “only going to be 15 minutes or so.” Personally, I’d rather stick a quarter in the meter than get a $60 ticket, but if you’re one for living on the edge, join the queue, so to speak.
Upside down stamps
Hands up Brits if you make sure your stamp with the Queen’s head is always stuck on the right way? Me too. Were you told it was an offense or just that your mail wouldn’t be delivered? The Treason Felony Act of 1848 is often cited as the reason for this practice, but apparently it’s an urban myth, and there is no consequence for an upside down stamp. In contrast, an upside down stamp placement in the U.S. is believed by many to be a message of love.
No filming or flash photography!
A few years ago I saw comedian and talk show host Bill Maher perform. Before the show the audience was asked not to take film footage or flash photos during the performance. Halfway through the set, Maher stopped, bent over and called out “I can see you” to a guy in the third row. Unbelievably, the guy continued recording, even when Maher said, “You are stealing my work, you realize that?” Nothing. Maher finally gave up and continued with his monologue. If there’d been a Brit nearby, the camera would have been forcibly removed and well … let’s not go there.
Last month I went to a performance with a lot of Brits in the audience. Again, we were asked not to take photos or video footage. One lady who had come in after that announcement proceeded to snap away during the first ten minutes, only to be firmly prodded on the shoulder by a women who had left her seat and walked five rows up to ensure the rule was upheld. I was sitting right behind the offender but took the more American approach of a) “What harm is she doing?”, and b) it’s not my job to make sure audience members behave themselves. Besides, she was bigger than me!
And if you think this is a gross generalization of Brits, people in much higher positions agree. Thorbjorn Jagland, Secretary General of the Council of Europe, recently called the U.K. the “best pupil in class” for obeying edicts from Strasbourg.
Brits, has living in America made you more likely to flout rules? Tell us below: