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Series: 1 | 2 | 3 | 4
Jeff has fallen in love with a red shoe on his morning train…and the leg attached to the shoe, and presumably the woman attached to the leg. When he eventually gets a chance to speak to her, poor Jeff is so nervous that he somehow blurts out that he only has one leg.
But the beautiful stranger takes pity on the amputee, and Jeff can't believe his good luck! He is in a relationship, with a gorgeous woman who is keen on him, and he hasn't said anything else that was stupid (besides the bit about the one-leg).
Steve is in the bar with Jeff and Patrick, cringing at the memory of watching a documentary with Susan the night before in which the narrator revealed a guarded secret: all men masturbate, even when they are in a stable relationship.
So, Jane and Sally are obsessed with finding out whether Steve still goes solo. Meanwhile, Susan has invited her notoriously frank parents over for dinner, while Patrick and Jeff scour sex shops looking for Patrick Junior.
Susan's latest project is to choose some furniture for the flat that she and Steve will share together. Against the backdrop of selecting fabrics, the truth slowly emerges about a deep mystery: why Steve and Sally have suddenly started acting so strangely...Sally's naked bum and Patrick's private parts might have something to do with it.
We find out what happened in the previous episode…
Sally calls for a Code Red rescue from her oafish date, which Patrick performs perfectly. But will he perform again? The next day, in a one-time-only offer, Sally decides that they should do it immediately! Both of their apartments are occupied, but she has the key to Susan's place and arranges to go round "to use the shower". Soon a haunted Patrick is sitting on Susan's bed, appalled and frightened at the arrival of the terrifying spectre known as Melty Man.
In Sally's salon, Sally and Susan commiserate about expanding faces when Jane stumbles in, freshly sacked from her job as a traffic reporter. But Jane is only slightly worried because she has a plan to hit stardom in children's television, with the help of her mysterious new friend, Jake, who has an unerring ability to tell the truth.
Meanwhile, a grim-looking Patrick strides into the bar, determined to finish with his latest girlfriend, Lynda, who has made The Big Mistake: she ruled out the possibility of ever having a threesome. How can a relationship survive without hope? Patrick performs a clean break with Lynda on her answering machine. Barely has he hung up when, much to his horror, Lynda arrives and admits she wants to arrange a threesome - tonight.
Steve and Susan prepare to celebrate their year anniversary, when Steve suffers a frightening experience, a wedding invitation delivered to their door. According to Jeff, this is a time bomb that will ignite when five little words provide the spark: "Where is this relationship going?" Whilst Jane and Sally contemplate being the "Woody"s in the toyshop of life, Steve plans drastic action to cut short his anniversary dinner with Susan short.
Steve and Susan prepare to celebrate their year anniversary, when Steve suffers a frightening experience, a wedding invitation delivered to their door. According to Jeff, this is a time bomb that will ignite when five little words provide the spark: "Where is this relationship going?" Whilst Jane and Sally contemplate being the "Woody"s in the toyshop of life, Steve plans drastic action to cut short his anniversary dinner with Susan short.
Jeff has finally found his female counterpart, a woman who can't help blurting out ridiculous things if she's attracted to someone. To make matters worse, Julia is a senior manager at his firm (his boss, actually).
After a sequence of typical Jeff blunders, he is in despair. Soon, however, Julia kisses Jeff and he thinks that his luck has at last changed. She leads him blindfolded into a conference room, where Jeff celebrates his good fortune by doing ecstatic strip tease.
Unfortunately, Julia wasn't luring him into the conference room for sex, she was leading him to his surprise birthday party…
Steve seems incapable of making any decisions and Susan is beginning to despair. A guilty Steve finds himself exchanging telephone phone numbers with an attractive girl he meets in the bar, while Susan pretends to be French in front of a handsome franchophile. Is this the end of the line?
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