Lily Allen
Lily Allen

First of all, an apology: we had no intention of running another X Factor judges story so soon after yesterday’s astonishing revelations. But this is rather good, so bear with us.

The Story So Far: lots of famous people are reportedly being considered as potential judges on the US X Factor. Lots of other famous people are reportedly being considered as judges on the UK X Factor. And one of those people is Lily Allen, whose position in the show was described yesterday as being 80% confirmed.

This, apparently, is news to Lily herself, who posted the following barbed riposte on her Twitter feed: “Nice to know that I’m 80% confirmed to be a judge on X Factor, anyone thinking about running it by me? Maybe that’s the 20% bit… ”

She then said: “I’ll only do it if there’s a pop songs in a foreign language week,” and put up a link to Stevie Wonder singing “My Cherie Amour” in Italian.

This then lead Piers Morgan — a man who is not above making waspish comments on Twitter in much the same way that the sea is not above the sky — to retort: “Did Bianca Gascoigne turn it down then?”

NOTE: Bianca Gascoigne is the former wife of soccer star Paul “Gazza” Gascoigne, and slightly famous in her own right. Not a major showbiz player, you see, that’s the gag.

Lily’s response was equally cutting: “Don’t be a snob Piers, it doesn’t suit you, oh wait a minute… carry on!”

Which provoked Piers to say this: “‘Laughter would be bereaved if snobbery died.’ – Peter Ustinov

And then this: “If you need some tips on how to be a talent judge, you know where to find me. (Answer: Hollywood).”

Clearly, Lily had had enough by now: “YOU ARE SUCH A D**K!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!”

Which is basically a win for Mr Morgan. And a lose for the X Factor.

Are you Team Lily or Team Morgan? Tell us here.

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Filed Under: Lily Allen, Piers Morgan
By Fraser McAlpine