• Keep your earplugs handy: Leona Lewis and Jordin Sparks, winners of X Factor and American Idol, respectively, are planning a transatlantic duet. Great, two Mariah Carey wannabes trying to out-yodel each other. Pooches from Honolulu to Hammersmith are already howling at the prospect.(Contact Music)

  • Madonna is trying to adopt another Malawian child.(BBC)
  • Sir Salman Rushdie‘s ex-wife deep-throats a bacon cheeseburger.(Gawker)
  • Nicole Kidman has signed on for Woody Allen‘s all-star London film.(Guardian)
  • Prince Philip has Simon Cowell pegged.(The Sun)
  • Drunken teenage girls have brought international shame upon the UK.(Telegraph)
  • That fine role model for young British girls, Ms. Amy Winehouse, has made an unusually intelligent career decision. (The Sun)
  • Girls Aloud play “S&M aliens” in their video for “Untouchable.”(The Sun)
  • Parlophone has allegedly bungled the release of the new Pet Shop Boys album.(The Sun)
  • Maxwell Caulfield, hubby of Juliet “Tabitha” Mills, admits he wears a rug.(The Sun)

  • Gavin & Stacey‘s Mathew Horne gets a style profile in The Daily Telegraph. He admits he “always wears Nudie jeans because they are a great cut: skinny, but not too skinny at the top.” He also owns “a M&S stripy T-shirt, meant for ladies…That’s the only item of women’s clothing I own.” And he says James Corden “has more fans” than he does.
  • Rhys Ifans thanks Richard Curtis for casting him in Notting Hill, bringing him “from unshaggable to shaggable. And thank f*** it happened in that order.”(The Times)
  • Steven Van Zandt of The E Street Band has termed Primal Scream frontman Bobby Gillespie “a waste of space”.(Guardian)
  • A first look at the new Red Dwarf.(Guardian)

***ANGLOPHENIA WILL RETURN TUESDAY, MARCH 31st***

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By Kevin Wicks
Kevin Wicks is the founding editor of Anglophenia.