We Spoke Too Soon: UK Tabloids React to Heather Mills’ Axing

What…are the British papers working on a two-day delay? Did the news travel by rowboat across the Atlantic or something? Heather Mills was eliminated from Dancing with the Stars on Tuesday evening, and we're just now seeing reactions from UK news outlets. Perhaps folks Victoria Newton at The Sun needed the extra time to sharpen their knives–and they went for blood: "AT last American viewers have seen sense and booted LADY MUCCA off Dancing With The Stars," Newton sang out in her column today. She goes on:

She fled America in a strop, snubbing a top chat show. TV comic Jimmy Kimmel who had lined Heather up as star guest, told viewers she had gone home, adding: "She hates America."

He then ridiculed Macca's ex – dubbed Lady Mucca due to her porn past – with a spoof montage of her dance moves.

In one clip a woodpecker was seen attacking her fake leg, while another saw flames spouting from her heels.

In a final clip, the charity campaigner's leg flew off mid-dance – smacking an audience member in the face.

Good riddance to bad rubbish, I say.

Oh, Vicky, we thought that you'd be happy if Heather succeeded. It would mean she'd have stayed the hell out of England. Now she's darkening your doorstep yet again: is Ms. Mills considering Celebrity Big Brother? That's one way to wash the taste of Jade Goody out of people's mouths, I suppose.

Now to the horse's mouth: Mills reflects on her Dancing stint to ABC News. On the differences between the U.S. and the UK, she says it all comes down to American spirit:

"I just think Americans are more positive, you know. They really think, and more open-minded," Mills said. "You know, I don't get treated badly in England at all with the public. It's just a group of media that do that with many, many people. It's not just me. So I have very positive reaction in Britain."

"But we're more reserved, whereas in America they're like, 'Yea, that's great,'" she continued. "And when they feel encouraged or inspired they get motivated. They'll react."

Showing that our American positivity rubbed off on her, she takes a swipe at Dancing judge Carrie Ann Inaba:

"Had we stayed in, I wanted to get Carrie Ann [Inaba] to stand on one leg on a stilt and actually feel what it's like to be on an artificial leg," Mills said.

That's the bee-yotch/victim we know and love! We knew the Era of Good Feeling wouldn't last. Hey, Heather, wasn't it the whole point of your participation to show that the disabled shouldn't be treated any differently? (Ha.) Well, false leg notwithstanding, she did well in the competition – her "Mambo Italiano" dance was really quite fun to watch – and we give credit where credit is due.

Kevin Wicks

Kevin Wicks founded BBCAmerica.com's Anglophenia blog back in 2005 and has been translating British culture for an American audience ever since. While not British himself - he was born and raised in St. Louis, Missouri - he once received inordinate hospitality in London for sharing the name of a dead but beloved EastEnders character. His Anglophilia stems from a high school love of Morrissey, whom he calls his "gateway drug" into British culture.

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